William Worden – The Four Tasks Of Mourning

The four tasks of mourning by William Worden are a renewal of the grieving process. The previous model for this process divides grief into steps that a person undergoing some form of loss must go through. However, the perception of grief in divided into steps can place the mourner in a passive role and lead to negativity as they go through the tougher periods.

Often a loss process is associated with a period of grief. Thus, we refer to grief as a process that takes place step by step instead of as a series of tasks, which reduces the grief’s commitment requirements. This is because you see the results of the process only as a natural consequence of the passage of time.

William Worden, one of the most recognized specialists in dealing with grief and loss, has developed a series of steps that mourners must take in the role of active traders within their own process. This means that you practice healthy grief and prevent it from becoming chronic.

Loss

Even the most positive parts of life are not free from loss: from a promotion in the workplace that involves loss of previous jobs to parenthood, when you have to leave another life with fewer responsibilities.

In general, one can categorize human losses in today’s society as

• loss due to the death of a loved one
• reduced functionality as a result of losses related to physical and / or mental health
• losses related to the job and thus losses related to one of the roles in daily life

• damage caused by war and / or natural disasters
• theft of valuables
• separations after divorce.

Sorrow

This is an inherent process that involves the transition to a new stage without the object of a loss (for example, a loved one). Grief generates a series of biological, emotional and behavioral reactions that facilitate adaptation to the new environment. And also to the development of new roles in your life without the deceased.

Several authors focus on the study of grief and its organization in stages or phases. Here, William Worden has prepared a series of tasks for people who have to go through the situation. This active role does not contradict the idea that a developed grief is a process that needs time.

The four tasks of mourning according to William Worden

These range from accepting the reality of loss to adapting to an environment without what one has lost. Grief is a process and not a condition, so the tasks of grief include cognitive processing. This is the kind that prepares you to cope with certain circumstances and accept the experience of loss. It is an adaptation to a different and less desirable world than before.

Accepting the reality of loss is one of the four tasks of mourning

There is a sense of unreality when someone dies, even if it is due to natural causes. The first task is to confront the person’s passing away and to know that you will not be able to interact with them again in this life.

It is common to think that you see the deceased walking on the street or to set a table for them at the dinner table after the loss. At the same time, some people find it difficult to perform the first task because of their belief in reincarnation.

William Worden on working out grief after loss

The physical, emotional and behavioral pain in the grieving process is real. Failure to acknowledge this pain can lead to abnormal behavior followed by physical and mental problems. Not everyone experiences grief with the same intensity. It is actually possible to lose someone close to you and yet not feel any pain.

A person is often unprepared for the whirlwind of emotions that will shake them in this process, no matter how much they expected the loss.

Denying the loss, however, prevents a way out of grief in the long run. People who consciously avoid it do not let it go either. Psychological counseling is of utmost importance in cases where people get stuck in this task.

One of the tasks of mourning is adaptation to the environment without the loved one

Adapting to the environment without the loved one involves both external and internal tasks. In other words, adjustments concerning how the death of a person affects the image one has of oneself, one’s values, beliefs and the external adjustments required in the absence of the deceased’s daily tasks.

The mourners must adapt their own personal identity within the grieving process with regard to internal adjustments. This does not just mean that they should see themselves as widows or as parents who have lost a child. Instead, it is about how their loss affects their spiritual beliefs and value systems.

Setting goals for yourself after the loss is also important. Part of the grieving process is, for example, taking responsibility for things that the person who left has previously been responsible for.

To find a connection to the deceased and move on with his life

The fourth mourning task proposed by William Worden describes the need to find a lasting bond with the deceased. This is so that they can establish other repertoires of behaviors adapted to the environment without that person being there at the same time. There may be several links with the loved one, including:

• clothing that was special
• photographs
• photo album with family

• short videos.

This is one of the most difficult tasks because the consequence of skipping it can cause you to become entrenched at the time when the deceased was still alive. Thus, it can make you avoid the demands that the context places on you today. It can be said that psychological intervention is necessary when a mourner holds on so tightly to the relationship with the lost person that it prevents him or her from being in contact with others in the present.

Grief is basically a requirement for adaptation, so it is normal for difficulties to arise in connection with the environment. The problem is when these processes become chronic and do not allow the individual to develop personally, and give rise to psychological problems.