The Reasons For The Constant Fear Of Being Abandoned

There are people who are constantly afraid of being abandoned. This constant fear of being abandoned makes you notice and analyze everything. One analyzes each word to confirm one’s fears. People think things like: “He does not want to stay with me. I do not mean anything to him. He does not love me. ”

When we start a relationship and are afraid that our partner will abandon us, this is exactly what happens sometimes. This is because the fear is so great that it becomes an unhealthy addiction. This fear causes the person to control, harass and distrust their partner. In the end, this damages the relationship and can cause it to end.

Relationships change over time. Our friends may one day decide that they no longer want to be our friends. Both life and relationships change. However, the constant fear of being abandoned does not allow us to accept this fact, and it is something that makes you believe that all changes in the relationship are negative.

To understand people who have a constant fear of being abandoned, you need to focus on their childhood. You may not remember much from your childhood, but if an emotional addiction develops during this time, this can lead to problems in adulthood.

All children develop a sense of affection in relation to their guardians. They are the people who help them with their needs and make them feel safe. Several studies have shown that the reason why the fear of being abandoned arises as an adult is that something was missing during childhood. Let’s look at this further.

• Lack of consideration. If the guardians do not hug the children or show them physical affection, the child will grow up with this fear. This can also happen if the parents do not say something nice to the children.
• Absent parents. The people who are afraid of being abandoned believe that their parents did not give them enough care. They may have focused too much on the job, simply been absent or had too much to do. This has a strong impact on children.
• Our parents’ relationships. The parent’s relationship is important so that the child does not develop this fear. Infidelity, for example, is very important for a child’s sense of security. If there is infidelity in the parents’ relationship, the child will grow up with a fear of being abandoned by his partner.

A constant fear of being abandoned can be very stressful, but it is a defense mechanism that these people develop as children. Instead of developing healthy bonds, these individuals will develop an insecure addiction, and thus often distrust their partner. The person will also develop and show emotional dependence.

If you are constantly afraid of being abandoned, you have probably been in relationships where your partner has been unfaithful to you or has been too dependent on your parents. You will then unconsciously repeat the same pattern that you experienced during childhood. The only difference now is that they occur in other contexts with other people.

When we realize that our relationships with our parents have an impact on our adult lives, we may become angry at them and want to blame them. But remember that they did the best they could. As you are now an adult, it is you who is responsible for the decisions you make. It will not help to blame others. You have to work with yourself.

The best way to recover from a negative addiction during childhood is to work on your self-esteem. This will help you stop being dependent on others to meet your emotional needs. By improving your self-esteem, you will be able to trust both yourself and others, and thus also be able to maintain healthy relationships.

Remember that you can not undo what happened to you during childhood. However, you can decide to work with yourself and solve the problems that have arisen for you. Take control of your own emotions. The road to being able to have healthy relationships is not easy, but it is worth it.