Learn To Love In Balanced And Healthy Relationships

Two strangers pass each other on a train. Their eyes meet and magic arises immediately. But there is a series of mishaps that separate them. Their families do not agree; they find jobs in different cities. But in the end, one of the two performs a heroic act and manages to reunite them again, against all odds, and they live happily ever after. Today we will talk about balanced and healthy relationships.

Does this sound too good to be true for you? That could have been the plot of many of the romantic movies that come out every year around the world. Do these stories then fit into a realistic idea of ​​what love is all about? Do they promote a balanced and healthy relationship or do they lead to toxic addictive relationships?

It is first and foremost important that we be awakened from that idealized romantic love that has surrounded us since childhood. It may seem trivial, but the fact is that songs, stories and movies have taught us unrealistic stories and perspectives on how a relationship should be. Society is an accomplice when it comes to spreading these stories.

When we grow up, we get an idea of ​​what it means to fall in love and what we should expect when this happens. We also get an idea of ​​how we should behave about who we should be attracted to. For example, who has told us that slimmer people are more attractive? It was not the “universal” a few hundred years ago.

There is nothing that can be denied: culture and upbringing have had a great impact on the relationships we have. It is therefore important that you change your perspective. That perspective where you think that only love makes it worthwhile. They tell us that if you fall in love, it will be forever and that we must give everything to find love; otherwise it will mean that we have failed.

The general perception is that we should find a person to complement us, and that no one else will be able to do this if we lose that person. So we do everything we can to get that partner to stay with us.

This does not create balanced and healthy relationships, but toxic relationships where the emotional dependence becomes extreme. Everyone has to forget their past life and now just do things together. But is this really love?

In a toxic relationship, the other person’s health and happiness are put before your own. Jealousy is common, and you also tend to avoid friends and family and just spend time with your partner.

These are toxic, addictive relationships that only create problems and pain in all areas of life. They can also lead to abuse, and it is therefore of utmost importance that we exchange these romantic perceptions of love for more realistic ones.

If we want balanced and healthy relationships, we must treat them well. We must be aware that when we fall in love with someone, we do not become a single being. Every person still has rights and needs that do not only have to do with the relationship.

You must of course feel comfortable with each other, have intimate meetings and build trust. However, you do not have to do everything together. It is possible to be independent and at the same time be in a balanced and healthy relationship.

We should therefore set healthy boundaries and work with trust and openness while preserving our own individuality and freedom. Each person must feel that he or she can spend time with others or himself or herself.

This means that you know how to give, but also that you know how to receive. It is about finding a balance where each half experiences joy both individually and within the relationship. Love is also something you learn!

Photos: Anthony Mapp, Ezra Jeffrey and Jen Palmer