How To Handle A Stressful Family In The Best Way

Sometimes we get stressed by our families. There are times when the roots of the family tree capture us and do not let go. We become entangled in their toxic behaviors, their demands, their phobias and their affective bonds driven by narcissism. We must deal with this dynamic in order to protect our dignity and improve our relationships. We must not let a stressful family affect us negatively.

Some say that  birth is like falling out of a chimney. We never know where we will land and which socio-affective scenario will be the first – the one that will largely determine our psychological structure. We also do not know what types of bands we will learn from our parents.

If it’s almost like a lottery to end up in a good family, it’s also a lottery to survive the family and avoid damage from frustrations and tensions  that we cannot always resolve. It is common for certain problems to persist and for us as adults to run counter to our parents’ values, resort to aunts and uncles, and even compete with siblings from time to time.

Living with others is not easy. But these antagonistic processes can flow naturally as long as there is respect. This is what makes us trust our families, who should be there no matter what happens. But what if that is not the case? What should we do when there is no respect and our state of mind is continually undermined and damaged?

How should we act when we have a stressful family suffocating us?

We always tell ourselves not to make the same mistake again. We convince ourselves that we should not participate in family gatherings or celebrations that always end badly. We try to be determined not to give in to emotional blackmail, for the demands that tend to trample on our self-esteem. But we fall into the same trap over and over again.

So how can we stop this? They are our family, and like all heredity built on blood and genetics, we try to honor and respect them, even though the price of our stoic devotion is constantly rising. We handle situations that we cannot handle and allow ourselves to be blackmailed. We lower our heads and  bite our tongues to avoid ruining lifelong relationships in an instant.

When you have a stressful family, you think of many things. Maybe it’s time to formalize a definitive departure? Or should we continue to suffocate ourselves in this bloodbath for life? There is no reason to fall into extremes; it is not healthy or sustainable.

Let’s see what guidelines you can follow.

Family conflicts wear you out because of the emotions and the conflicting positions. This emotional attrition can go so deep that you begin to process and exaggerate any words or gestures in this suffocating family situation.

You should first work on relaxing and finding inner peace. When you have swallowed so much in a lifetime  , you accumulate a lot of frustration and anger. You have to channel all of these things. Once you have ventilated these emotionally charged rooms, it’s time to take the next step.

When people do not develop a strong sense of identity, an identity that is well-defined and separate from the family, their emotional well-being is in constant danger. You must cut the umbilical cord and treat yourself as an independent being, rooted in your own ideologies, values ​​and needs.

When your identity and self-image are stable, there is no room for doubt, and you know what is right and acceptable. Furthermore, you will see these toxic behaviors and narcissistic actions more clearly, and you will  have fewer problems setting boundaries. You know they are necessary to improve cohabitation.

A stressful family has its roots in a lack of harmony and arises because there is a force field where some people act as opponents instead of teammates. A very important fact in these scenarios is the constant need for recognition. We avoid deviating from the path to avoid disappointing others.

An authentic family is a unique microcosm where every multiple element lives together in perfect harmony. It is a precious jewel, where the most varied minerals have formed their own crystals of different colors, fantastic properties and unique characteristics.

The beauty of this jewel is its diversity. Everyone is different and exceptional in their own way. We must understand that a good family respects and helps each other, instead of suffocating and creating obstacles.