How To Become A Good Negotiator

You are actually specially prepared to be able to become a good negotiator. Most children are good at negotiating. They know what cards they have. They know that they can make others happy (by behaving well, for example) and do not hesitate to use these cards to get what they want in return.

To become a good negotiator, you need to possess a number of skills and handle them properly. Confidence, determination and flexibility are important, but there are also many other things to consider. And the good news is that you can train yourself for this!

A dealer’s main tool is courage and integrity. Thanks to them, we can defend our interests and values, while being smart and eloquent. If you are going to negotiate about something, it is therefore good if you know that there are certain strategies that can help you, especially if you choose the right opportunity to use them.

As we have said, we had potential as children as well. For example, when we asked our parents to read another story to us before we went to bed. Our parents were our first rivals, because we negotiated without even being aware of it.

When we start negotiating, it is initially normal that we activate our prefrontal cortex and experience a certain nervousness. If we then do not believe that we will be able to handle the situation, our amygdala will make us afraid.

To get over the panic, it is best to plan ahead. For example, you should have a clear idea of ​​what the goal is, how to proceed and collect as much information as possible. It is also good to know a few tricks, such as opening a negotiation by using the “anchoring effect”.

Our brain activity is concentrated in our mirror neurons. These help us to be empathetic with the person in front of us, which creates a climate of understanding and trust. We look for signals on how the person we are talking to will feel and act. We adapt to the person’s mood and act accordingly. At this point, it is important to be able to communicate.

We may come to a point in the debate where we encounter a dead end. But before throwing in the towel, it is a good idea to use the tools you have available, both verbal and non-verbal. Gestures are as important as words. If, for example, you notice that the other person does not seem to like your proposal, frequently changes his or her mind, or does not maintain eye contact, it is better to change the method of negotiation.

There are two important occasions when you should be extra vigilant: when you greet and when you say goodbye. The best handshake is a vertical movement without turning the palm or exaggerating the movement.

If both parties have benefited from the negotiation, then the brain may not feel satisfied. In these cases, the brain is not focused on a situation where both win but on winning or losing. Success is not measured in financial gain as such, but according to how satisfied the people feel.

There are other types of negotiations where an attempt is made to reach a common agreement. In this case, the two negotiators know that if one of the parties is not satisfied, it will not be long before the agreement is torn up. We will therefore try to take care of and protect our own interests, but we will also try to ensure that the other person sees the results as positive.

If we perceive that our negotiation results are positive, then the brain’s reward system will start. When activated, the body will secrete neurotransmitters such as dopamine and oxytocin. But if we do not believe we are successful, then neurotransmitters such as adrenaline will probably be secreted. That is why we feel angry, disappointed or down.

Many specialists believe that you have to put your emotions aside and be objective in order to become a good negotiator. This is the basis of game theory, which advocates a cold and sterile process in which all involved are completely rational.

But this is something that is very difficult to achieve as we are all human; emotions are a part of us. It is almost impossible to prevent our emotions from influencing the decision we make, and it is a good idea to know how to deal with them so that they do not deceive us.

Emotional intelligence and the ability to criticize oneself are two things that are important in order to become a good negotiator. Thanks to them, we will be able to understand a basis, analyze the cause, learn from it and become better at negotiations in the future.

The following skills are beneficial if you want to become a good negotiator.

• Listen actively: you should not only hear, but really pay attention to what the other person has to say.
• Determination: make sure that you present your point of view, but that you also respect the rights and perceptions of others.

• Self-confidence: be brave and stay straight.
• Balance: give and expect something in return. It is a negotiation and not a charity task.
• Optimism: your willingness to negotiate, listen to suggestions and change will bring positive results.
• Empathy: it is good to be patient if you feel pressured.

To become a good negotiator, it is important to know how to use the brain and follow the advice of neuroscience. There we have many types of personalities, but it is important to know how to find just the right dose of emotion and logic.