Emotional Rooms – My Favorite Place Is With You

One of the basic strategies for mental health is to create and place yourself in positive emotional spaces. These are places where the main rule is to “live and let live.” These are environments where you can feel free and grow, but it can also be environments that are linked to something or someone. We should all have a favorite place, an enriching space where we can flourish and grow emotionally.

The subject of emotional space is not a new concept. However, most of the existing documentation and the books that deal with the subject almost always discuss these spaces in a work context. We are all aware that the daily emotional atmosphere in the workplace in particular affects us more than most other places. You may not always find what you need at work to feel comfortable and relate well to others. And that makes it difficult to give your best to the organization.

However, the interesting topic of emotional spaces goes beyond the work context. To begin with, there is a fundamental phenomenon that we should not forget; from the moment one or more people live in a space together, they create a certain atmosphere. All people generate emotional emissions. These unite with the emotions that the other people release and create either an enriching, hostile or neutral atmosphere.

Some psychologists say that it often only takes about five minutes to capture an emotional climate in a home and a family. This is enough to be able to read expressions, tones and communication style. With this information, an observer can derive a lot.

Interestingly, many real estate agents testify that potential buyers know within 30 seconds of entering a home whether they like it or not. This is because sometimes, even when there are no people around, our brains absorb very subjective emotional stimuli. Lighting, colors and other details have an emotional value based on our experience and our personality.

As you can see, this is a topic as comprehensive as it is interesting.

Herman Melville said that the most beautiful places are not visible on the map. Two people who love each other in a mature way create the most beautiful rooms between them. They knock down their own walls to open up to the other person. In their garden they plant respect and reap satisfaction. Each person invests in their own happiness because they know that their inner well-being will benefit their loved ones.

You may not realize it, but positive and qualitative emotional spaces are not easy to build. One mistake that often leads to failure is to believe that all meaningful and happy atmospheres are created by making other people happy. If you believe that, for example, you can become lazy and submissive at work. You will lack the initiative to propose and create positive changes in your workplace.

At the same time, on a relationship or family level, you become the person who prioritizes everyone else’s feelings over your own. Eventually, it will cause an atmosphere of damned frustration, bitterness and dissatisfaction. What we want to clarify with these examples is that positive emotional spaces require investment in yourself first. Take some time to reflect on this.

Human nature, along with emotional maturity and self-confidence, limits the formation of toxic atmospheres.

If you already have all these qualities within you, they will fulfill your behavior and consequently your emotional climate. It is important to understand that all enriching emotional atmospheres depend on the psychological profile of their members.

Your everyday emotional rooms should be your favorite places. The places where you can always be yourself. There you know that your ideas, values ​​and feelings are respected. These are confined spaces where your relationships do not feel like chains or foot shackles. Instead, they are like warm winds that fill your sails with hope and make you feel free and full of opportunities.

It is not enough that people love you, they must love you well too. To create generous and positive emotional spaces, we recommend that you use these simple strategies. Let’s take a look at each of them.

Instead of focusing on the emotional states of those around you, start with yourself. What affects emotional spaces the most is personal frustration, irritability or being in a defensive position. Take a close look at your own feelings and learn to deal with them before you take out your anger, anxiety or your shortcomings on other people.

• Positive reinforcement. Experts in emotional space state that on average people can tolerate one negative comment per day (as an accusation, criticism or warning) as long as we get 4 positive comments. At the same time, too much positivity can feel fake or artificial.
• Constant, sincere and determined communication. In addition to positive reinforcement and emotional encouragement, a qualitative emotional environment requires constant dialogue. All parties must engage in active listening and practice empathy and determination.
• Facilitate real contact. In a work environment, it is easy to cope well with many people. However, an authentic environment (at work and at home) is when you feel that you can get “contact” with others. This is something that transcends ordinary courtesy or even language. It is called mutual understanding.

• Be attentive. Last but not least, an essential strategy for nurturing an emotional space is to know how to pay attention to the details. Keep an eye out for these daily subtleties. If you look closely, you will discover this consideration, gratitude and phrases like “thank you for being here”, “what would I do without you” or “my favorite place is with you”.

Think about these things every day to create much happier environments for yourself and others.